For someone who loves food so much, I am a pathetic cook.
I am a HOT MESS in the kitchen. We all recall the Great Smoke Alarm Incident last month when I attempted to grill a small pizza in the oven and how well that ended. Every Sunday, my friends and I go to the Farmers Market down the street. They stock up on things to use during the week while they’re cooking, while I look on helplessly and stand there squeezing the avocados. (What? I like the way they feel.) FAIL.
You’ll all love this. True story: when I was 14, I got asked to babysit these two little boys I knew. I arrived as the parents were rushing out the door. “They need dinner!” the mom called. “Make them something easy. Make macaroni and cheese!”
Okay. Macaroni and cheese. Easy, right? I knew enough to know the first step - boiling water to cook the pasta in. So, what did I do? I boiled water - IN THE TEA KETTLE. And when it started bubbling, I POURED MACARONI IN. INTO THE TEA KETTLE.
Suffice it to say, the little boys heard some f-bombs that day. As the tea kettle basically exploded with pasta and water, that’s when I decided the domestic life was not for me. We ate pizza that night. I bribed them with candy so they wouldn’t tell their parents.
Behold, a PINK George Foreman Grill! Okay, confession: I’m not as pathetic as I pretend to be. I actually already own a George Foreman, and know how to use it. (Occasionally, I grill a turkey dog or two if I’m really hungry. Like, once every four months.)
I like this and think I may need it - it’s only $15! At the very least, it might get me a LITTLE excited about cooking. Added bonus: the color is called “Lolita,” which really makes me laugh. I don’t know who was in charge of naming these things, but they seem to be a little out of their element. Like me near a stove.