Tuesday, May 11, 2010

It Easily Could Have Been Me

Last night at dinner, I sat next to Lea Michele from Glee.

Being from LA, I rarely get starstruck over celebrities. That’s not to say I don’t think it’s cool when I see them, it’s just that I understand that they’re normal people too. The only celebrity I ever went up and spoke to was Kelly Clarkson -- she was on an airplane in the seat behind me the day after she won American Idol. I didn’t even talk to Oprah when I saw her! Yes, I saw the big O at lunch at the Polo Lounge in the Beverly Hills Hotel on Oscar weekend.

(Here’s a tip from me to you: if you want to see celebrities, go to the Beverly Hills Hotel on Oscar weekend. I’ve also seen Mischa Barton (when she was not a crackhead), Warren Beatty, and Nicole Kidman there on Oscar weekend.)

But I literally almost peed when I saw Lea Michele. That's how much I love Glee! For the rest of my meal, I sat in my chair, silently freaking out and texting everyone who would care.

She was adorable and tiny. When I say tiny, I mean tiny. Roughly the size of a fun-size Snickers bar. No, seriously though, she was barely five feet tall and SO SKINNY. Her new bangs looked adorable too - I came home and pasted my hair to my head to look like I had bangs until my roommate made me stop.

Seeing her got me thinking about luck, fate, and how it happened that she got cast as the lead in Glee as opposed to it being me. Granted, she has a voice that could put Whitney Houston to shame, but I have a sparkling personality and am incredibly witty, so I feel as though we’re really tied.

Then I started thinking about her character, Rachel Berry. Though many find her character to be incredibly annoying, I like her -- she has balls, spirit, and pluck. Typically, I am drawn to characters like Blair Waldorf and Regina George (sense a pattern?), but for some reason, I identify very much with Rachel Berry.

Some ways that we are similar:

  1. She is Jewish. Need I say more?
  2. She likes to be the star of the show. Again, need I say more?
  3. She has brown hair. Usually, I do too. Currently my hair is red, but if need be, it could be back to brown in a heartbeat!
  4. She is the child of two gay dads. Although I cannot say the same is true for me, I am a proud supporter of the gays in every single way. Also, I was recently told that I am a gay man in a straight woman’s body, to which I say: true.
  5. She is on record as saying that she is “dying to sing with Adam Lambert.” Let me just say that if that happens, my brain will explode of happiness and glitter. And clearly I TOO am dying to sing with Adam. Chalk that up as another similarity!
  6. Not once, not twice, not thrice, but FOUR TIMES Rachel has worn an outfit on Glee that I personally own. I will say, however, that it was not any of the sweaters she’s worn with an animal on them. Nope, more like Marc Jacobs sundresses, but still: we clearly have the same sense of style.

In conclusion, I can only say that there must have been some strange fluke that caused her to be cast in Glee instead of me. If the stars had aligned differently, it would be me on the show, and her sitting next to me, eating sushi, quietly freaking out.

Don’t you agree? :)


Marni said...

yes! whoa! you two are the same person! why don't you audition for glee? i'm sure they always have new roles to fill! and you would be perfect in it.


Anonymous said...

I totally agree! Go for it Jordan!

Diana said...

O...M...G!!! I can NOT believe you sat next to her at dinner! Actually, more surprising is that you didn't just pull up your chair to her table and join her! It could have been FABULOUS!

I'm LMAO about your #5 becuase I can literally see your head explode with happiness and glitter!

You sure have quite the life, Your Majesty Jordan!